My struggles with 
caffeine are 
well-documented.  During many a 
Pibb-fueled all-nighter, I find myself in intense 
[bliss] from all the carbonic acid.  I wonder, "wouldn't it be easier to just take a pill?"
So far, ingesting caffeine in the form of socially-acceptable soft drinks has allowed me to maintain a feeling of [weakness].  I [welcomed] the Hypermints ad's attempt to transform me into a hard-core pill-popper.  If the editors of Adequacy determine that ad banners are necessary for the site's continuing financial stability, I obsequiously implore you to please advertise products [like this again].  [Perhaps] you could advertise products such as freebase heroin, L. Ron Hubbard novels, or slutty teens sucking oral sex.
[This diary was slightly edited by zikzak]