Adequacy front page
Stories Diaries Polls Users

Home About Topics Rejects Abortions
This is an archive site only. It is no longer maintained. You can not post comments. You can not make an account. Your email will not be read. Please read this page if you have questions.
Sex Should Be Postponed Until
Age 18 8%
Age 20 1%
A long term relationship 21%
Marriage 21%
Puberty 46%

Votes: 56

 Solving Teen Pregnancy

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Jul 10, 2001

For too long Americans have witnessed a dramatic rise in the rates of teen pregnancy. Our welfare system has been stressed to the limits by a plague of single mothers and the basic institutions of the family have been eroded. Our government institutions have done little to address this problem and we concerned citizens have been left wringing our hands.

Until now that is. According to a recent article in the Washington Times, a Maryland High School is about to implement a bold, brilliant and breathtakingly simple plan that is sure to reduce teen pregnancy.

[editor's note, by osm] Spelling checker


More stories about Sex
Lolita's World: The disturbing tendencies of the modern man.
Homosexuality - Is it the next evolutionary step for mankind ?
Open Letter to a Stripper
The Sinister Secret of our Schools
Don't look at me.
My husband wants to do my ass!
'English Style Lovers', with jsm
I'm a teenager, and I want it bad!
I have not had relations for months!
My neighbors are foreigners, and they don't fly a flag
Should we circumcize our boy?
Active recruiting
My wife hungers for dark meat, and my nephew is a Commie!
Uncle OSM's Guide to Covert Dating: Episode I
My husband wants me shorn!
Uncle OSM's Guide to Covert Dating: Episode II
My inlaws are not fertile!
Taboo: The Downfall of America
The Time is Right for Manual Sex
Help save a baby, and snowballs
The supposedly civilized Europeans. (A WARNING TO ALL AMERICANS)
It's all about the numbers
Caffeinated mints, and getting into the body you desire.
Why can't I get a second date?
The Heterosexual Geek's Guide to Feigning Homosexuality
I want a mistress!
Mommyism in the Workplace
Lesbian Parenting and the Myth of Gay Children
My roommate is gay! My roommate is a drunk.

More stories by
Peter Johnson

The Law Fought The Law And Nobody Won
Winning The Battle Against Pornography
The Science of Poetry
A Time For Patriots
Victoria, BC: Potemkin Village of the Frozen North
Writing Satire For A Technical Audience
The Proselytizing Atheist
Boom City, USA

It's a simple undeniable fact that the number of people on this planet has more than quadrupled in the past 100 years. It is equally undeniable that the last 100 years have seen the advent and widespread adoption of communications technologies that have brought filth and perversion into the living rooms of families around the globe. Clearly the two trends are related. By advocating lifestyles of promiscuity, television and radio have encouraged millions of otherwise decent and godfearing people to deny their natural impulses and engage in sexual acts.

This not only weakens the familial bond, but it also stresses the earth's precious resources to the point where our planet cannot currently support all of its inhabitants in the comfortable two parent, two car lifestyle that God desires for all his children. Clearly, something must be done.

That's why it's so exciting to see Maryland's Frederick County school district implementing a program to counteract these subversive media influences. The plan is simplicity itself, all students enrolled in health classes (a required course) will be asked to sign a sexual abstinence pledge. In addition, a pro-abstinence curriculum will be taught. Finally, our nation's children will learn the truth about sex.

You don't have to look very far to see exactly how deluded Americans have become in their attitudes towards sex; a simple glance at the magazine rack at your local grocer's will suffice. You will see many magazines targeted towards women advertising helpful tips to help in acheiving orgasm. It's a simple fact that if young women believe they will have some sort of "orgasm" during intercourse, they will be more likely to engage in sexual activity. It is also a simple fact that the so-called "female orgasm" is a myth. I can assure all my readers that I have yet to observe a woman appear to enjoy sex. No matter what you may read in these magazines or see on television, a good woman merely endures sex out of a duty to her husband. Hopefully the enlightened educators in Maryland will manage to convey this to their students.

Is it any wonder that students in this country are expirimenting with sex at early ages considering what they read, see and hear in the media? Is there any doubt that when they are told the harsh depressing truth about sex, they will choose to remain abstinent until marriage? The Frederick, Maryland school board should be congratulated on this innovative and brilliant proposal. My only complaint is that it does not go far enough. I suggest making chess club membership mandatory for all high school students as well as providing them with extensive collections of Star Trek (the original series) memorabilia. These are the tools I used to maintain my chastity in high school and I have no doubt that they will put an end to our present epidemics of deviant behaviour and bastardy.


I know! (2.50 / 2) (#4)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 07:44:19 PM PST
Make them use Linux!

throbbing penguin lust (5.00 / 2) (#18)
by johnny ambiguous on Thu Jul 12th, 2001 at 06:24:20 AM PST
Why, using Linux - indeed even merely talking about using Linux (e.g. while posting from a Win98 machine) - is enough to excite any natural nerd man to a throbbing state of painfully overextended masculinity. If you don't believe me, point your newsreader to comp.os.linux.advocacy. And don't get me started about those BSD characters, who should probably consider some kind of regular dosage of tranquilizing medicine, or saltpeter, or something.

The same is true, but to a lesser extent, of using MS-DOS - it's the lack of a GUI which makes it such a macho activity. Well, come to think of it, maybe not. When using MS-DOS one feels not present-moment sexual excitement but what you might call sexual nostalgia; hazy, far-off, long-gone memories of tender desires, gratified lusts in days long past...

Now using a Mac is also stimulating, in an erotic way. Everybody knows that! It's notorious. It's just that it stimulates one to that exotic variety of sex (I believe the phrase I'm looking for is English style love), which, heh heh, has zero chance of resulting in pregnancy, unwanted or otherwise.

But there's something about using those Microsoft GUI OSes (I mean, Microsoft, that's a tip-off right there) that has the same deleterious effect on the reproductive instincts as witnessing with one's own bleary eyes, a Star Trek convention... Yeah, yeah, sure, but let's leave that curvy android broad with the metal eyebrow doodad out of this, kay?

Yours Johnny A.

Getting into my Chevrolet Magic Fire, I drove slowly back to the office. - L. Rosen

you are making a dangerous mistake (none / 0) (#20)
by jsm on Thu Jul 12th, 2001 at 09:44:35 AM PST
It's just that it stimulates one to that exotic variety of sex (I believe the phrase I'm looking for is English style love), which, heh heh, has zero chance of resulting in pregnancy, unwanted or otherwise.

Sadly, due to the fact that sperms are surprisingly tenacious and swimmy little blighters, couples who use anal sex as a means of contraception tend to get pregnant at a surprisingly high rate. This is how the English reproduce.

... the worst tempered and least consistent of the editors
... now also Legal department and general counsel,

I totally disagree! (5.00 / 3) (#5)
by Electric Angst on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 07:45:03 PM PST
That is the most ass-backwards view I've ever read. In fact, it is the exact opposite of what should be done. Very simply, there is only one cure for teen pregnancy, and that is more orgasms (and orgasm advocacy), not less.

Yes, that's right, these kids are being turned on by all kinds of elements in out culture, even each other. The sexual tension builds, and the kids don't know what to do about it. Finally, they just go with their instincts, and stick things in each other's orrifices until orgasm.

So, how do we stop this? Simple, we teach them better ways to acheive orgasm. You can't get pregnant from mutual masturbation, oral, or anal sex. These activities should be taught, demonstrated, and even allowed in school. (I personally suggest a "moment of masturbation" to happen every school day, around 9:30, the horniest time of the school day.) This will be the only way that we can eliminate teen pregnancy, and I do hope that blind-sided bigots like yourself will see the light...

In the dark times, will there still be singing?
Yes, there will be singing. There will be singing about the dark times. -- Bertolt Brecht

9:30? (none / 0) (#16)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 11th, 2001 at 11:36:26 AM PST
What designated that as the horniest time of day?

I always thought it was about two hours after whenever lunch happened, but maybe that's because I'm male and have the "waking up from being sleepy leads to an erection" trait.

me too, me too (none / 0) (#22)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 18th, 2001 at 10:04:22 AM PST
actually, a daily break for that for us working slobs would be nice too.....

myth? (4.00 / 1) (#6)
by sputnik on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 07:46:48 PM PST
It is also a simple fact that the so-called "female orgasm" is a myth. I can assure all my readers that I have yet to observe a woman appear to enjoy sex.

a simple fact? please cite a source.
i would venture a guess that it probably has something to do with your technique.

The female orgasm wasn't discovered... (3.00 / 2) (#7)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 07:55:35 PM PST
...until the 18th century, when an English physician chanced upon it. Does it not seem a tad suspicious to you that something so supposedely fundamental and worth looking for was not known of for the first 80,000 years of human history?

The female orgasm is an invention of modern times; how much easier to get a woman into bed if she has a motive, after all. This is why it has universally been men who have discovered and promoted the female orgasm, and why feminists so disparage the ability of men to give them orgasms (they think the men can't do it, when in fact it is just an impossibility).

Women can of course enjoy sex, but the orgasm is forever tied up with the concept of ejaculation. Women have a more holistic and profound enjoyment of the process, and emotional rather than an animal one, hence their insistance on being hugged and cosseted after the act.

Female orgasms (5.00 / 1) (#8)
by sputnik on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 08:11:23 PM PST
I would suggest that the delay in their discovery was in part due to the low standing and appreciation of women in the past.

Many of my female friends masturbate - for pleasure. They have had and do have orgasms through intercourse and manual stimulation. I say this with certainty, for they had no reason to mislead me on the matter.

The fact that women have a more compete enjoyment of the sexual act does not preclude their ability to orgasm.

Because men ejaculate when they achieve orgasm does not mean that women must - and the fact that people link ejaculation and orgasm means *nothing*. And it may come as a surprise to you (pun intended), but many women DO ejaculate - take a college level sexual education course.

And with no offense intended, may I submit that any man who has not seen a woman experience an orgasm (barring those unfortunate never to find themselves in a sexual situation) are simply poor lovers whose partners do not even feel the need to fake.

A female perspective (5.00 / 1) (#12)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 11th, 2001 at 01:22:57 AM PST
Many of my female friends masturbate - for pleasure. They have had and do have orgasms through intercourse and manual stimulation. I say this with certainty, for they had no reason to mislead me on the matter.
Speaking as a woman, I can confidently state that you are mistaken: liberals have made it socially unacceptable for women in our society to admit that we cannot reach orgasm. Anorgasmic women are stigmatized as uneducated, narrow-minded, former victims of sexual abuse, or just plain defective. Small wonder that we go to such great lengths to hide this.

Absolutely (5.00 / 1) (#13)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 11th, 2001 at 02:13:10 AM PST
It is a real shame that this is the case. The cult of the female orgasm, as portrayed in such films as 'When Harry met Sally', has led to an terrible pressure being put on females to become complete through sex.

Of course this is not possible. Women who cannot have orgasms are referred to as 'frigid', which hass connotations well beyond the physiological.

Pity that there couldn;t be some sort of movement to educate society about the female orgasm, and put to rest the insidious cult which surrounds it.

Hey Peter... (0.00 / 1) (#11)
by extarbags on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 09:45:38 PM PST
...Maybe the reason you've never seen a woman appear to enjoy sex is because you're no freaking good at it!

btw, here's elby's version of this same article, "edited for content:"

"Sex is a joke, unless you engage in it with goats, as I do."

Welcome to reverse-troll land, kiddies. When the site is a troll, the trolls are the truth.

When the site is the troll, the troll is the truth.

What would be better (none / 0) (#14)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 11th, 2001 at 06:53:02 AM PST
Force everyone contract some sort of STD that makes it excruciatingly painful to have sex. Then, only those people who really want kids will go through the suffering.

They need to learn how to control it (none / 0) (#15)
by Orion Blastar on Wed Jul 11th, 2001 at 08:25:59 AM PST
the problem seems to be many teenagers don't have control over their urges. They also need to learn to take responsibility for their actions. If those actions produce a child, they have to take care of the child. For many it is as simple as not having sex to avoid having children. For others it is practicing some form of birth control if they are sexualy active.

A relative of mine once said "You made your bed, now you got to lie in it". We need to teach the teenagers today that they reap what they sow, whatever they do will come back to haunt them later. So they need to look at what they are doing and figure out if it is the right thing to do. Think about the future instead of just the present.

If they are just trying to fill a "hole" as another story had suggested, they need to learn to do other stuff to fill that "hole" instead having sex.

You can't change teenage irresponsibility (none / 0) (#17)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 11th, 2001 at 11:41:51 AM PST
Teenagers have proven time and time again that they are completely and totally incapable of controlling themselves when pleasure is the issue. They simply have no consideration for the long term, and no understanding of anything approaching a risk/reward ratio. This has been thoroughly demonstrated in such fine documentaries as The Fast and the Furious.

Teaching responsibility to teenagers will certainly help them grow to be responsible adults. But it won't bring down the teenage pregnancy rate, and that is why we need to teach teenagers that sex is filthy and painful before they discover it the hard way and get the girl pregnant in the process.

I shudder to think... (none / 0) (#25)
by Laughing Canuck on Wed Dec 5th, 2001 at 04:49:18 PM PST
...what the our children would be like if we did teach them that sex is "filthy" and "painful" like you suggest. Sex doesn't have to be either of these things, and in fact it SHOULDN't be either of these things.

I imagine, however, that their first experience would be something like this.

Teenage pregnancy aside, North America has serious issues with the way it (doesn't) deal with the basic facts of human sexuality. I'd much rather see healthy treatment of human sexuality on my TV screen (ie: In the context of a serious relationship) than the kind of flippant partner-switching, or worse yet the senseless violence we choke on every day.


What the ... ? (5.00 / 1) (#21)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jul 13th, 2001 at 01:57:28 PM PST
What the hell are you folks going on about? Orgasms a myth, or only 'discovered' by men recently? Do I dare say how much of a suprise this is to me - all these years, and I've been imagining it? *laughs hysterically* I take it you think the multiples bit is a myth or product of an overactive imagination too? And to think, all this time I've been deluding myself ... *blinks*

Dear lord ... I'm surrounded by chauvanists and feminazis bent on convincing me I'm really not as happy/content/free as I'd like to think I am. *still chuckling*

I don't know about the rest of you apparently unsatisfied folks but ... I love sex. I revel in it. And I've never felt 'forced' or 'coerced' or 'tricked' into having it. I'm not ashamed in the least of my sexuality, and frankly, feel sorry for those who, for whatever reasons, are. I thoroughly enjoy my orgasms, thankyouverymuch! Have no problem with masturbation (and no, it's not usually due to not having been satisified in bed - would you believe, sometimes it's nice just for the fun of it?)

I would suggest that before you go around pointing fingers at everyone else for the faults or problems you're finding with this, you look to yourselves and your own personal hangups. Last time I checked, I grew up in the same world as you. And in a very chauvanistic (and religiously stifilng at times) home environment to boot. Life is what you make it - not what others create for you. So is your sex life, and the enjoyment you can get from it.

Heh .. annonymous poster be damned ... Nathicana :)

uh....what "DICK-head" created this arti (none / 0) (#23)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 18th, 2001 at 08:02:54 PM PST
Now this is something only a man could have wrote!! The female orgasm being a myth...well if you got any you would know this to be untrue because trust me they are real. I being a female can honestly tell you that I DO enjoy sex and dont do it for the purpose of a man just to wiggle his ass on top of me and me to just sit there and let him do it just to pleasure him...No! Oh well maybe you have issues or your "Man-Part" is just small!!!!!!

your kidding, right? (none / 0) (#24)
by midnitesun9 on Thu Jul 19th, 2001 at 07:36:35 PM PST
" It is also a simple fact that the so-called "female orgasm" is a myth." What female bashing male a$$hole came up with that one? As a mother of 3 who is engaged to be married, I'm depely offended. I do agree we need more sex ed in schools, but only if they get parental permison. I'm sorry, but making kids sign forms saying their gonna be little angels and not have intercourse, or, as the case for males according to this, not have a orgasm tell their married, is gonna do next to NOTHING to prevent teen pregency. It's just gonna make them more interested in intercourse and from where I'm standing, it's gonna cause alot more teen preggencies. The way to prevent it is let them witness a birth in person. Thats the best protection out there, not some paper that most of them will proberly forget about within a hour after they sign it. This article is obseevly telling teens that in order to please people, they need to be considered a geek (note Star Trek and Chess club. I knew more then one kid with those interest in school who got beaten up on more then one occasion). I'm sorry, but whoever wrote this and agrees with this aren't worth it.

A little bit of rubber... (none / 0) (#26)
by Anonymous Reader on Sun Dec 9th, 2001 at 07:26:43 AM PST
Scare youngsters with sex? Thats old school and it didn't work at all. In countrys with sex-education teenage pregnancies are a very small problem you can't argue with that. Teaching about the joy of sex and preemptives is the only way. And all you stupid rightwing-american gits should have realised that by now.

sex education? (none / 0) (#27)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Mar 29th, 2002 at 03:13:11 PM PST
heh; countries with sex-edu have a low teen-preggers rate?
i come from britain, and i can assure you, that aint the case... place is full of little slappers with bairns and absentee 13 year old fathers.


All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective companies. Comments are owned by the Poster. The Rest ® 2001, 2002, 2003 The name, logo, symbol, and taglines "News for Grown-Ups", "Most Controversial Site on the Internet", "Linux Zealot", and "He just loves Open Source Software", and the RGB color value: D7D7D7 are trademarks of No part of this site may be republished or reproduced in whatever form without prior written permission by and, if and when applicable, prior written permission by the contributing author(s), artist(s), or user(s). Any inquiries are directed to